Carving Out a Mokum for Kedusheh and Ruchniyus in Our Lives

Carving Out a Mokum for Kedusheh and Ruchniyus in Our Lives

As we delve deeper into the theme of Yiras Shomayim, I will now pivot from our prior discussions concerning the Tayves A’chilleh. Our previous efforts to challenge this inclination have undeniably caused a disturbance in its grip upon us, and through this, we’ve sought to cultivate a stronger, more genuine Yiras Shomayim. We will soon see to what extent we’ve achieved this

Let us broaden our view and address Yiras Shomayim from a fresh and practical perspective. We will explore Yiras Shomayim through a different angle, one that will illuminate both our past endeavors and our lifelong obligations within the framework of Yiras Shomayim.

Reflecting upon Churban HaBayis, I believe there is a common mistake in the way many perceive the main point to reflect upon is the reason why it happened, which is Sinas Chinom. While there is truth to this, it may be taking it in an overly sophisticated way. Before deciphering the reasons, we should first confront the stark reality.

Consider a case of g’neiveh: One sees an expensive car, covets it, and eventually succumbs to stealing it. Suppose this person wishes to do teshuveh. If he focuses solely on addressing his Chemdas Momon, his greed, through study and self-discipline, yet fails to return the stolen vehicle, then his teshuveh is incomplete. He must also relate and work on the simple act of stealing, not just the deeper and more sophisticated level of the underlying desires.

Similarly, there are dual aspects to contemplate regarding the Beis HaMikdosh. One aspect is the actual destruction – the actual loss. The other is the underlying cause, Sinas Chinom. Churban HaBayis means that something actually happened. Perhaps the reason why it happened was Sinas Chinom; however, we neglect to give even a small amount of consideration to the concrete reality of what happened.

We always think about why it happened. But that’s already overly sophisticated, skipping an important stage. You first have to think simply. The simple thought about Churban HaBayis is that something terrible happened; the Beis HaMikdosh was chorev. You have to think about what that means.

Beis HaMikdosh literally means a sanctuary or place for K’dusheh. That means that K’dusheh needs a place. And without a place, all the K’dusheh in the world won’t emerge. With the destruction of the Beis HaMikdosh, we lost that sacred space where the Shchineh, the Divine Presence, could reside. But now it can’t be here because it’s lacking a place. 

Our Avoideh thus demands that we, too, create a place where ruchniyus can emerge. Alas, like the physical destruction, our space for ruchniyus has become desolate. This is the essence of Churban HaBayis on a personal level.

So, what constitutes our personal place for ruchniyus? This is intricately tied to the concept of Yiras Shomayim. The posuk states, “יראת ה’ היא אוצרו” – “Yiras Hashem is his treasury.” A treasury serves as a place to store valuables; thus, Yiras Shomayim represents the repository for our ruchniyus. The Nefesh Ha’Chaim asserts that Yireh is also the place for Torah, though the idea of Yiras Shomayim as a ‘place’ may seem elusive or intangible.

So let’s think about the most simple thing in Yiras Shomayim. I will not be defining what Yiras Shomayim means exactly. Instead, I’ll share with you its most fundamental prerequisite – a condition without which Yiras Shomayim cannot possibly emerge.

There have been individuals who mistakenly believed I was reducing the concept of Yiras Shomayim to one simplistic component. This is not my intention. What I am emphasizing, though, is that there is a fundamental precursor to Yiras Shomayim without which it simply cannot exist.

This essential cornerstone is none other than achrayus, responsibility. I am not suggesting that responsibility alone encapsulates all of Yiras Shomayim. However, devoid of this key element, the structure of Yiras Shomayim cannot stand. Reflect on your daily life, and you may find a troubling tendency to skirt around true responsibility.

If one was to truly accept responsibility, everything they engage in would find a proper place. Learning would flourish because one feels accountable for their growth in learning. Halocheh would be more diligently observed because one feels an obligation toward it. Tefillah would be more fervent because one is committed to the davening. Midos would improve because one holds themselves accountable for their conduct.

But where there is an absence of responsibility, ruchniyus can not reside. Lack of responsibility stymies any kind of growth and causes one to think, “There are already gedolei Torah. I have their phone number and can simply call upon them. Why should I strive to become a Godol Ba’Toreh myself?”

Take the chinuch of children, for example. In our times, especially in America, it’s become a trend to seek eitzes and advice constantly from ‘experts’ in parenting.

I don’t understand it. The Ribbono Shel Olam entrusted a child to you, it didn’t come out of the blue. So that probably means you have the capacity to nurture and educate that child. That’s why he gave it to you, and not someone else. Hashem evidently believes in your ability to make the necessary decisions in raising your children. It’s a rather straightforward concept.

Yet, what do we see? For every minor issue, parents react hysterically, frantically seeking counsel for even the most trivial matters. Many, too many, relinquish their basic parental responsibilities to others, rather than developing maturity and wisdom in chinuch themselves.

Why should someone rise to the challenge of becoming knowledgeable and confident as a parent when they can defer all responsibility to an expert at the end of a hotline?

This is Churban HaBayis – where the place in your heart, designated for ruchniyus, lies in ruins. There’s a wholesale abdication of responsibility. Not only by chinuch, but also when it comes to learning and applying halocheh to everyday life. I am certainly not advocating for someone to forgo seeking rabbinical advice when studying halocheh or facing a halachic question. Shying away from guidance would also be irresponsible.

The problem is the broader issue of having no aim; of defaulting to others out of habit. Worryingly, even some rabbis shy away from the weight of psak, choosing instead to navigate through the opinions of past poskim without asserting their own understanding or effort to reach a decision; R’ Elyoshiv says so, R’ Sholmo Zalman says so – והבוחר יבחר. And as time progresses, the opinions will dwindle, until there will only be one de’ah left.

Without a personal sense of responsibility, there is no impetus to become a poisek – to truly delve into and resolve halachic dilemmas. Why should one strive to grow in halocheh, in learning, or in davening if responsibility is eschewed at every turn? This aversion to and absence of responsibility pervades every facet of avoidas Hashem.

I’ve been told that Musser and character refinement isn’t fashionable or trendy in today’s world. However, I believe it’s not Musser itself that is unpopular, but rather the concept of responsibility that accompanies it. It is this responsibility that many find unsettling.

If one were truly responsible, it would become clear that one’s life shouldn’t be driven by kovod, envy, or any tayveh for that matter. Imagine a scenario where a person’s intellect is consumed by the pursuit of honor, their gestures are dictated by greed, and their movements are propelled by jealousy. They may be active in the community, seeking respect and accruing wealth, under the impression they are leading a commendable Jewish life.

Yet, should one accept the mantle of responsibility for their Avodas Hashem, they would quickly recognize that without working on their middos, responsibility remains an elusive goal. Who genuinely desires responsibility anyway these days? Without this drive, one can carry on without Musser – indeed, they can drift through life without any avoideh whatsoever, content with the status quo, feeling just fine how they are.

This approach is irresponsibility in essence, and that afflicts the whole world, not just our own circles. Whether we’ve adopted these attitudes from the outside world is subject to debate. Nevertheless, the symptom of shirking responsibility is evident in many aspects of modern life.

Consider the example of my son’s neighbor with his old car – that has four pieces in total. When a problem arises, it’s straightforward to identify and rectify due to the car’s simplicity.

In contrast, take modern cars equipped with complex computer systems. If the computer doesn’t precisely diagnose an issue, many mechanics have no idea what the issue could even be.They rely wholly on the computer, opting out of the responsibility that comes with diagnostics and repair. Even when the problem is identified by the system, they are loath to touch the car – the responsibility too great. 

Doctors, too, are a telling example. You visit a doctor, and he assures you, “Alright, I’ll take a look, I can help.” So he examines your hand, yet he’s specialized only in wrists. Should there be an issue with your knuckles, Heaven forbid, well, you’re directed elsewhere – that’s beyond his purview. Responsibility for the entire hand seems too grand a task; he confines his expertise to the wrist only. “If it’s this area,” he says, “I’m your man. Anything beyond that, you’ll need a different specialist.” 

Why should anyone strive to be a person of stature if they avoid all forms of responsibility? Nobody is responsible for anything anymore. Without responsibility, there is no impetus to grow.

This brings us back to the minimum requirement for Yiras Shomayim. Please understand, responsibility alone does not define Yiras Shomayim, but Yiras Shomayim cannot be approached without responsibility. They are intertwined, inseparable. To claim Yiras Shomayim while simultaneously shirking responsibility is contradictory – a תרתי דסתרי. Responsibility is the foundational step that paves the way for genuine Yiras Shomayim.

Yiras Shomayim, you see, hinges on the deep recognition that avoideh is intrinsically your business – a personal undertaking. It relies upon you; hence, it compels responsibility. Throughout our lives, there seems to be this universal impulse to shun responsibility, to offload the burden. This tendency is the crux of what we denote as Churban HaBayis – the failure to provide a space for ruchniyus to unfold. This is the essence of the Beis HaMikdosh, literally the dwelling place of the Shchineh: without it, without our own personal mokem, the world will be devoid of ruchniyus.

The expanse of this mokem for ruchniyus is not of concern; it’s the very existence of such a space that counts. When there is a place for Ruchniyus, no matter its size, the entirety of it needed can be revealed there; the size of the place is irrelevant.

Reflect upon the response of R’ Yisroel to R’ Naftoli: When R’ Naftoli thought he could only achieve greatness with the intellect of Sha’agas Aryeh, the heart of the Yesod Ve’Shoreh HaAvoideh and the middos of R’ Yisroel, R’ Yisroel corrected him, asserting that he must work with his own head, heart and middos – for the K’dusheh that is misgaleh molds itself to our vessel.

Similarly, when we carve out a space for Ruchniyus in our lives, all that is destined to be revealed to us will indeed make its presence known there. This space, however, must be a true and genuine ‘mokem’, a sanctuary; without a genuine space, we are left with an absence, a void.

Consider our day-to-day agenda, where so many strive to divest themselves of responsibility at every turn. The aim is to find the simplest path, to seek out a sefer that clarifies the difficult points in a sugyeh, or a satisfying tirutz in another one. The overriding question becomes, “How can I shed responsibility?” This practice, when it becomes pervasive, is nothing short of Churban HaBayis. We mourn precisely this phenomenon On Tisha B’Av – the loss of a space where the Shchineh can be manifested, both in the Beis HaMikdosh and within the personal domain of our lives.

In our ongoing endeavor of Yiras Shomayim, the focus might seem exceedingly broad, but it is rooted in the same principles we’ve addressed until now. Take Tayves A’chilleh as an example: The fundamental point isn’t about renouncing desire but about maintaining the firm position that the goodness of Hashem – His K’dusheh – will manifest in my life. 

Yiras Shomayim makes me understand that if I fail to uphold this, it negates the years of preparation by the Ribbono Shel Olam to bestow His ‘Tuv’ upon me. Every divine effort made on my behalf would be lorik, rendered futile, if not for the readiness of the space within that I have prepared. It hinges upon me, my resolve, my recognition that I must see this divine goodness – because I am responsible for it. 

Tuna is a great example. Doctors may caution against its copious consumption due to the presence of mercury, which accumulates at the top of the food chain where the tuna resides. This accumulation is not incidental; it reflects the culmination of generations of life within the food chain – smaller fish eaten by larger ones, leading ultimately to the tuna. The Ribbono Shel Olam meticulously orchestrated for years this chain of events so that you might savor the Tuv Hashem. When you consume that tuna fish, years of Hashem’s work culminate in that very act.

Yet, if one lacks awareness of this divine effort, what becomes of it? It’s a busheh ve’cherpeh. If we do not recognize this manifestation of Hashem’s work as something tailored for us, as something we are responsible for, the potential K’dusheh remains untapped, aloof. We fail to facilitate its revelation in the world because, in that moment, we do not furnish the necessary place for it to dwell.

It’s the same thing as the Beis HaMikdosh. The Shechinah exists beyond our physical realm, of course, yet it requires a space in our world to be revealed. Without that space, the Divine Presence cannot manifest among us. The work of Yiras Shomayim involves creating within ourselves a sanctuary where the Shechinah can be revealed. If we neglect this spiritual task, the opening for Hashem’s goodness to shine forth into our lives is left closed.

Every mitzvah and each tefillah involves responsibility. The Anshei Knesset HaGedolah understood precisely what needed to be expressed through our tefillos until the end of the days. If tefillah is recited mechanically, without consciousness or intention, the unique opportunity for revelation of k’dusheh at that time and place is lost – dissipating uselessly.

Yiras Shomayim is when we realize our role; we perceive that it is, indeed, up to us to provide the vessel for this K’dusheh. With every mitzvah we perform, we are not only fulfilling an obligation; we are facilitating a Gilui Rotzon, a revelation of Hashem’s will, or His Tuv, Chesed, or whatever form it might take. Hashem’s desire is for something to be disclosed through us, and this actualization hinges upon our actions.

Yiras Shomayim in relation to mitzvos, learning, and all aspects of life involves tremendous work. It requires us to constantly approach each facet of our avoideh – whether it’s how we eat, learn or daven – with a profound sense of personal accountability. It compels us to ensure that Hashem’s rotzen and chochmeh have the right place here, in our existence. This task rests squarely on our shoulders.

This, then, is ‘mokem’ – the space Yiras Shomayim requires. Hence, Yiras Shomayim is described as a place because it is the environment within ourselves that we must cultivate, where the divine can be revealed according to our personal capacity and actions. Responsibility is pivotal to this endeavor, shaping the way we engage with every mitzvah and aspect of our lives.

Now, as we turn our attention to the context of learning Torah, let us deepen our exploration of Yiras Shomayim that is predicated upon the recognition that the development of ruchniyus is ultimately our own responsibility, our business. There are further layers and dimensions that we must strive to understand and integrate. It requires rigorous self-examination and a willingness to push our limits, and I will challenge you to extend beyond your comfort zone into deeper understanding.

Yiras Shomayim shapes the way you approach any Mesima, any undertaking, in a manner that prepares you for the potential of K’dusheh having a place to be chal, to take effect or becoming realized. It must be approached with preparation and expectancy, not as something that occurs automatically without our active participation.

By Tayves A’chilleh it is very obvious, as we have previously discussed. When one approaches food with the fervor dictated by desire, the potential for the Tuv Hashem to be revealed in that moment is obscured. Instead, you must prepare your approach in a way that will allow the Tuv Hashem to unveil itself.

But in the realm of Mitzvos or learning Torah, this is more tricky, more nuanced. Now this might feel like a departure from our comfort zone; a more challenging perspective that may be met with resistance. Remember though, you possess seychel – I think there is no better place to use it than in avoidas Hashem.

So, how then does one embody Yiras Shomayim in learning? 

I will share with you a personal reflection, revealing how one might lack Yiras Shomayim in their approach to learning. This does not mean smoking on Shabbos for example, as that has nothing to do with the approach to learning; rather it involves a deeper form of disconnect in the approach itself.

I, for one, am endowed with strong koyach ha’dimyon, a vivid imagination that allows me to interlink varied ideas. This enables me to creatively build bridges between seemingly unrelated concepts in ruchniyus. But it is a double-edged sword, with my most recent thought often taking on disproportionate significance. With this robust imagination, I am adept at weaving together ideas, making them appear convincing and aligned with what the Torah says.

It is not difficult for me to use this in learning as well. I can contemplate a topic and suddenly be struck by an insight – though certainly not from shomayim. This idea may, at first glance, illuminate the subject matter compellingly. I may even convince myself that this insight is exactly what the Torah means.

Yet this is precisely what it means to learn Torah without Yiras Shomayim: to rely solely on one’s intuition, rather than a true search for the intent of the Torah as willed by the Borei Olam.

Sadly, this pitfall is not mine alone; many, especially the younger generation, grapple with a similar inclination to favor their own inventive ideas. They mistakenly take their own intellectual prowess for siyata d’Shmaya. Some truly believe that, and can not see that it’s a rather profound absence of Yiras Shomayim; a failure to approach learning with the recognition that our aim is to uncover the Hashem’s wisdom within the Torah, not to apply our preconceived notions, no matter how dazzling or how neatly they seem to fit with the sugya at hand.

Yiras Shomayim stands at the core of Torah learning. It compels us to create a space within ourselves for the chochmah of the Borei Olam to unfold. This hachoneh is our duty – to ready ourselves to seek not our own thoughts, but to reveal Hashem’s will. This task is daunting, tremendous in its scope. This is the profound work of Yiras Shomayim within Limud Torah, an undertaking that places the burden of divine revelation upon our shoulders as we seek to provide the proper place for His Chochmah to reveal itself.

In our pursuit of learning Torah with Yiras Shomayim, we must endeavor to shed our negiehs – our personal biases, the pull toward our own ideas. R’ Yisroel teaches that eventually our own seychel and middos play an important role in understanding the Torah, but it is only after significant effort to cleanse ourselves of self-serving perspectives; we must not approach learning with these biases at the outset. This is the essence of approaching learning with Yiras Shomayim.

Consider those who discuss Torah “freely,” as though it were their natural domain where they can roam unchecked; Torah is not a mere playing field of our whims and intellect. On the contrary, It requires a profound reverence, a sense of awe and trembling – an understanding that we are seeking to grasp what the Borei Olam desires us to learn. Such an approach necessitates deliberate hachoneh – preparation.

These stages we’ve discussed – recognizing our responsibility and preparing for revealing K’dusheh – demand extraordinary dedication, particularly for someone who grapples with a strong and vivid imagination. My engagement with a diversity of opinions and critiques, whether through delivering shiurim or interactive discussions, is my effort to stay true to this path. Yet caution is warranted; for even then, others might be impressed and caught up by the novelty of the idea, and you will still be far from the true meaning of Torah. 

Instilling yiras shomayim within one’s Torah is a challenge precisely because it is an active labor to prepare oneself for revealing K’dusheh. It relies on you. Without this effort, our engagement with the Torah risks becoming useless – akin to R’ Boruch Ber delivering a shiur kloli with no eager listeners – a tragic loss.

The situation is even more severe: It is Hashem himself who is giving a shiur, as we delve into Gemara or any area of Torah learning, and no one wants to listen. Our zeal should be concentrated on seeking the divine Chochmah. Yet, all too often, we become preoccupied with our own intellectual poweress and insights, falling prey to the exhilaration of intellectual breakthroughs. However, the realization that these “chiddushim” may indeed be “devorim beteilim”, empty notions, is a bitter pill to swallow.

This exemplifies learning devoid of any iota of yiras shomayim. A person entrenched in such study fails to prepare for the wisdom of the Borei Olam to emanate. Instead, they erroneously celebrate their own imagination. 

And here lies the problem: You really think you are immersed in Torah, making strides and progressing in learning, yet it’s all an illusion if there’s no foundation of Yiras Shomayim. It is all for naught. For we have not properly prepared for the Chochmeh Elyoneh to be revealed. Instead, we bask in the glow of our own kisharon and dazzling imagination.

Yiras Shomayim is indeed a profound force, defining a space within us where k’dusheh can be revealed. As we explored with Tayves A’chilleh, the absence of restraint results in no room for the Tuv Hashem – it can not enter. Yiras Shomayim, on the other hand, is the actual creation of a place for the will of the Borei Olam to manifest. 

So, we’ve got our work cut out for us. You now see the breadth of this topic – it’s enormous, spanning across learning, kiyum mitzvos, how we interact with others, and our middos. Yiras Shomayim should be that place within us that we prepare, so that the depth and k’dusheh that Torah aims to instill can shine forth from us. And it’s our duty to carve out this space. Otherwise, it all just dissipates into nothingness.

It is not just the next step but a whole new world of avoideh. Like ascending a mountain only to find higher peaks beyond, the work on Yiras Shomayim is relentless. But here, in this not necessarily comfortable but fruitful territory, we find rich soil for growth – where every aspect of our avodah, from studying Torah to raising our children, and from davening to working on middos, can flourish. That is the monumental scope of Yiras Shomayim, and what we need to be dedicated to working on.